Analects

Fool me once ...

nobody@vox.com(frogprof) — Tue, 01 Apr 2008 16:53:42 -0700

April FIRST?! which I didn't even realize until one of the DevGeeks here sent around Google's "Custom Time" thingy ...I just think they should've made a page that offered to let you TAKE BACK any e-mail you regret sending [before the recipient gets it]. *sigh* I shoulda known this was too good to be true! But then I tend to believe anything Google tells me [unless they direct me to ANY Wikipedia page].

I'm not really blonde. Just date-challenged [to which frogprofbro will happily attest, the big SNOT].

Not much going on [quoi de neuf?!] ... the Job is going well, although I'm about 53 e-mails behind. And no, I don't mean fun e-mails ... I'm talking about the ones from The New England Journal of Medicine, or The Journal of the American Medical Association, or the other myriad medical/health safety journals or newsletters I get on a weekly basis. And I'm supposed to peruse ALL of them to find articles relevant/germane/whatev to our site. (No, I'm not going to inflict that on you. You would leave me forever.) Out of the 53 e-mails, there may be 20 that have anything interesting in them ... but I still have to read EACH ONE in its entirety.

Bleh.

Planning my trip to The Mountain for my THIRTIETH high school reunion ... NOT that I'm anywhere near 30, mind you [actually, ACHA and I are 23 for the sixth time this year], but somehow I was graduated from The Academy in 1978. Chronologically impossible, I know, but still. The airfare alone is going to cost me $350; then there's car rental on top of that, PLUS the cost of the reunion weekend itself, PLUS having to stay at not-the-guest-house-I wanted-but-some-cheesy-motel-down-the-road. Yeesh. For a 4-day weekend, this is going to cost MORE than my California trip last year, I think! But -- if any of them shows up -- it'll be good to see all those people who tormented me back in the day... Last reunion I attended [I think it was the 15th], I was the only member of SA '78, so I had to have my "class photo" [me and the class banner] taken with the StA '78 gang. Which was actually okay, since I'd also attended StA's before SA, and thus knew most of the alumni from there as well.

Have [re-]discovered Alibris, and three weeks ago took delivery of a box of EIGHTEEN BOOKS, which -- since I'd ordered SO DAMN MANY -- cost me nothing in shipping. And the entire box came in under $50!! (A lot of the books were $1 apiece.) But even so, I still went to Bookstop and bought another eight [new] books as well! I am a bookslut. And I sure don't have anywhere to put them once I get them read ... Many of them will end up at the Paperback Traders shop [or whatever it's called]; I refuse to sell any more books to Half-Price because they completely rip you off. I'm fine with buying books there, but if I have any I want to get rid of [never very likely -- I re-read all the time], I either give them to friends, donate them to the library, or find ANOTHER store at which to exchange them.

Also have made good use of Coldwater Creek's outlet sale, and today received a box with 3 sweaters and 3 blouses in it. (Never mind that the temperature in Austin is close to 80 with 80% humidity!!) I think I have Texas' largest collection of sweaters, bar none. (And even better, I think I'm starting to have hot flashes. Either that or the office thermostat is really off.)

Hope I've proved to myself that I really CAN make links -- unless you're a glutton for punishment, don't bother with the medical links! (Although NEJM does have a fascinating, if frequently disturbing/gross/oogy Image Challenge every week. I surprise myself with how often I get the right answer.) (I've had an extremely checkered career path.) Happy April Fool's Day, everybody!

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Who knows where the time goes?

nobody@vox.com(frogprof) — Mon, 07 Jan 2008 11:54:32 -0800

How on earth did it get to be 2008?! Where did 1997 go?! And how did Britney Spears get out of the psych ward?! (Just kidding -- NOT -- on that last one ...Obviously Dr. Phil needed someone for this week's victim.)

Honestly, I've been back at work for 4 days -- I took 5 personal days and had two "holidays" off -- and I feel as though NOTHING happened in the meantime ... Christmas came and went so fast that I didn't get "in the spirit" at all! I didn't listen to a single one of my many Xmas tapes or CDs, I didn't watch "Rudolph" or "Frosty" once [actually, THAT was a conscious decision!], I didn't drink a single glass of hot cider -- didn't even make my nice-smelling whatever-it-is on the stove that smells like hot mulled cider [hot water with cinnamon sticks, cloves, and a few allspice balls thrown in, then simmer on the stove ... but keep an eye on it!]. I haven't had a tree since I left Houston lo these ... whoa, fourteen years!! I used to give a kickass [well, in MY mind, anyway] Open House and Tree-Trimming Party [shut up, frogprofbro] to which I invited anyone I ever met, including all the chirren I was sitting on at the moment (which made for a noisy but joyful house, lemme tell you) (and, when my best friend was still married to Whattaface, and he wore his Santa suit, he brought the house down!). I provided everything, including ornaments, but most folks brought an ornament ... so I have a really cool collection of eclectic ornaments!

But anyway. No hassles with the fam -- thank God! -- even the alcohol didn't lead to any trouble this year in ANY of the venues, despite my fears [I think my dear cousin may have had a word with someone, and if she didn't, then he'd gotten a clue from my body language in the last few meetings on his own ... which I doubt!!]. Frogprofbro et al. gave me THE perfect MP3 player -- no video screen [although I do have to use the Hubble telescope to read the teeny scrolling titles there are -- heh -- but that's the fault of my eyes and not the player!] and nothing but the facts, ma'am ... JUST what I'd wanted and hadn't been able to find in anything but the iBlow Shuffle -- which I would never spend the money on, partly because I wouldn't put the money in Apple's pockets and partly because I just think they're WAY too expensive ...so this weensy ma-cheen from Radio Chack is poifick! It holds something like 940 songs [2 GB, whatever that means, heh], and I'm about a third of the way there. Even got 2 free songs from Wendy's just because I always ask for a small fries and a ginormous Diet Coke [which cancels out the fries, of course] when I get a combo [that's their newest scam -- the free download from Rhapsody with a large drink]. But OF COURSE the Rhapsody downloads don't work on my ma-cheen! *sigh*

And Agate gave me a TON of gorgeous clothes -- many of which fit [although, Adge, tell me why you buy some in size Medium and some in size XXL?! psycho much?! hee] and some of which I'll return for [ahem, ugh] OTHER sizes. The Kidlets there gave me a GREAT Coldwater Creek bag which I plan to load up with everything I own and start carrying to work as soon as I can get around to emptying the summer-y tote bag I'm lugging right now ... Coldwater Creek is my favorite place to shop for ladies' wear. It's not grandma-ish -- most of the time -- although the "Western" wear can really get up my nose sometimes -- and the sizing is just right. 'Cept for the length of trousers, but I think that's a me factor and not a them factor -- if my hips are this wide, I really should be 6'7" tall. Anyway, one day I'll stop trying to dress like I'm still in grad school AND am 28.

So I guess that's about all the news that'll fit for now -- besides, The Boss keeps walking by, and I have a feeling he's going to catch on any minute that I'm not really revising Safe Practice Survey questions! Toodles ...

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Operation Find Don [trackback to TomatoNation.com]

nobody@vox.com(frogprof) — Wed, 12 Sep 2007 16:38:36 -0700

So I'm sitting at my desk at "work" [BWAHAHAHA -- The Boss comes back tomorrow so this is the last day for this] and, since I got lambasted by AJbro -- who also happens to be frogprofbro, but I guess he doesn't want to brag -- for not posting since last month, I thought I'd better do so.

I've been catching up with TomatoNation [a longtime favorite/bookmark], and the author, Sars [rhymes with "scares"], writes the most heart-wrenching 9/11 essays annually since that day. She has also, ever since then, been trying to find a man named Don who accompanied her on the trek crosstown as they made their respective ways home from the horror that had become downtown Manhattan. So this is my weensy contribution to Operation Find Don, in the hopes that he -- or someone who knows him -- will read this [yeah, sure ... but 6 degrees, right?] and finally get in touch with Sars so that she can at LAST buy him that beer.

MSNBC had the brilliant idea of running their 2001 coverage all day yesterday -- as if anyone needed any reminding -- and although I watched for about 6 minutes, that's all I could take before I got the same ready-to-vomit feeling I'd had 6 years ago in the UT Student Health Center as I watched the Towers come down in real-time. Didn't we see that enough, OVER and OVER and OVER for days -- weeks -- on end, the first time?! On the other hand, I heard some neo-con radio talk-show host ask last night if we hadn't had enough "major" remembrance events by now; if we shouldn't start "toning down" the memorial services all over the country. HELL NO, I say ... the services aren't for us, you fool, they're for the families of the victims, who won't EVER have enough "closure" or time for memorial services, because their loved ones were snatched away from them without the "luxury" of a goodbye kiss, or a last phone call in most cases, or anything to hang on to in terms of "remembrance." What an idiot. Maybe the country feels like it needs to move on, especially with a war going on [and I'm not going there, believe me] -- but as long as there is somewhere for the families to congregate, somewhere for the first responders to gather to remember their fallen brothers and sisters, then we continue to have these memorial services. It's like asking Holocaust survivors to start forgetting about the Shoah -- how long is long enough? It's long enough when THEY say it's long enough. Not some damn fool in front of a microphone.

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I'm legal again (mostly)!

nobody@vox.com(frogprof) — Fri, 10 Aug 2007 16:14:42 -0700

SMOR is pleased [and I hope those of the rest of you who were, I'm sure, waiting with bated breath will be, too] to know that I finally got my vehicle registration renewed today -- and the Very Nice Man at the tax office didn't even charge me for the overdue-ness of same! Moreover, he gave me a July sticker [by rights, he should've given me one for May], which made me very happy. Now I just have to get the car inspected, which will happen [she says hopefully] this weekend.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA. New bed, remember?!

Ahem.

Had to purchase a Microsoft book for a colleague today [I'm the office "librarian," so to speak], so in order to get somewhat cheaper shipping, I also ordered a murder mystery for myself -- on The Boss's credit card [but I told the accounts person that the amount is to be taken out of my paycheck -- including half of the shipping; sometimes I'm too honest for my own good].Then, having browsed around with my PDA in hand and discovered that several of my I-want-this-for-the-DD ["darn" dissertation -- see my profile if you really care] books were available for a PENNY [plus, of course, shipping and handling], I decided that I was going to go nuts and order a few more on my own card. Went SO nuts that I also ordered FOUR [count 'em] CDs -- all of girly romantic-comedy soundtracks. I'm pathetic. But hey, they're all "used" [except NOT -- I love how Amazon's Marketplace sellers have new stuff at used prices!], so they're all ... well, not cheap, but certainly cheaper than at a B&N store or than at Amazon's own retail prices. The only drawback is that they're all coming from different sellers, so they will ALL come at different times and on different days -- TO THE OFFICE. The Boss is gonna LOVE this. (Heh -- as if he'd notice.) But if I had any packages sent to my home, the Stupid Mailman would never bother to see if I'm home or not [as he didn't with Harry Potter 7 -- so I got it for FREE, thank you very much, Amazon's guarantee!] .... he'd just automatically leave it at the apartment office, which is always closed by the time I get home ... and I have to wait until the weekend to pick it up. Before 2 pm on Saturday.

NEW BED, REMEMBER????

So now it's time to start packing up the desk for the weekend and close down my brain [HAHAHAHAHA]; I have an appointment for a massage at 7 at Massage Envy and I gotta get in the right frame of mind.

OK, I'm there ... Hee!

Listen, if you live in a town/city/whatever with a Massage Envy franchise, I recommend them HIGHLY. The price is definitely right, and if the therapists are well-trained [and it can sometimes be hit-or-miss, but I've had mostly good luck], you will benefit enormously from their ministrations. The lady who owns "mine" is a doll, and her staff is almost unqualifiedly excellent. They are kind folk, most of them trained right here in town, and for the most part they've helped my chronic pain problem a LOT. So try 'em out. (And no, I was NOT paid for this endorsement! Heh.)

Bon weekend à tous ...

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I never learn ...

nobody@vox.com(frogprof) — Thu, 09 Aug 2007 16:00:16 -0700

Despite the fact that, through 2009, I'll be paying $35/month to TxDOT because LAST summer, while I was trekking back and forth between civilization (Austin) [although sometimes I wonder ...] and the [Rio Grande] Valley of the Shadow of Death on a weekendly basis, I got TWO traffic tickets -- one for an unregistered car [which I knew about] and one for not having proper insurance documentation [which I also knew about, but thought I could get taken off because I had the new documents at home ... and then it turned out my car insurance had been cancelled ...] ... Well, for having committed these two HEINOUS offenses, the State of Texas, in its infinite wisdom, is charging me a "Conviction Surcharge," as it does ANY convicted felon (that is, anyone convicted of DWI, no insurance -- well, those of us ANGLOS it can CATCH [oops, did I say that?!] -- and a couple of other hideous crimes against the state), to the tune of $35/month. (I said that, didn't I. What, me bitter?! Nahhhhh ...) So on top of $500 in fines, I'll pay another almost-$700 for my offenses.

Meanwhile, there are animals being abused by athletes ["allegedly"], women being raped and killed by the men they love, children being abused by their spiritual advisers ... But by GOD, the State of Texas is gonna get its pound of flesh from ME!!

I got off track there somewhere ... Oh, yeah. Despite paying all that money, you'd THINK I'd be johnny-on-the-spot to get my car registered and inspected EVERY YEAR WHEN IT'S DUE, wouldn't you? But nooooooo ... I still haven't learned my lesson. During the "5-minute huddle" this morning, SMOR [our pet cop] looked out the window and said,"Whose silver car is that?" [Well, to begin with, I don't know how he could tell what color it is, since it hasn't been washed in about 4 months -- not since it got its detailing after its wreck. (NOT caused by me but by some bimbette who decided she liked my lane better than her own and moved into mine without looking ...)] ANYway, SMOR decided that he'd start ragging me about my registration [it's only 2 months overdue, folks! Not like I'm riding around a YEAR late or something ... like last time ...] and my inspection [OK, now THAT one WAS due in Aug. of '05. I am slacking a bit there] until I got on the ball. And when SMOR rags, he RAGS. He's a pain in the back end at the best of times.

So I went first to get a replacement insurance card [of course my latest one is missing -- which NEVER happens, but I have an even worse mailman here than I did in the VotSoD*], which meant sitting in the icky insurance company office with a couple of screaming children and their oblivious mothers and grandmothers, the only non-Spanish speaker in the room, waiting and waiting and waiting while the business ahead of me got taken care of ever-so-slowly. FINALLY got my replacement card, went to the local grocery store -- where the Customer Service desk had already told me they sold car tags -- and the lady at the desk said, "Oh, we don't sell really OLD tags... if they're THAT old, you have to go to the Tax Office!"

Well, HELL.

And it's 96 degrees outside, of course ... and my lunch hour is almost over. So the hunt starts up again tomorrow.

I love my life ...

*Valley of the Shadow of Death

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This is me not blogging.

nobody@vox.com(frogprof) — Thu, 02 Aug 2007 15:46:20 -0700

I said I wasn't going to get caught up in this trap.

I lie a lot, too.

So anyway, the BED. Ahhh, the bed ... Remember how I said RatBag was going to need a trampoline or a stepladder to get her not-lithe self onto the new, 6-inches-higher mattress? Well, she didn't join DammitKitty and me when we hit the sack at about midnight, but when I awoke at my usual 3:30 a.m., by gum if the FatCat didn't jump, flat-footed, from the floor to the top of the bed all on her lonesome! She was mighty proud of herself, and I bragged on her so much that she started singing a BIG song, along with lots of kisses for Mommy, as well -- without which Mommy could have done quite nicely, thank you. But whaddya gonna do?!

But the BED. Ahhh. I haven't slept that well since ... I can't remember when, literally. I woke up this morning [again -- when the alarm went off] and actually fell out of bed, since I'd forgotten in the meantime that I was farther off the floor than I'd previously been. No damage done, thank goodness. Hope I remember tomorrow ... And I have a set of sheets that fits, too! On the old bed, they always ended up bunched up under me, causing bumwrinkles and irritation [mostly mental], and forcing me to remake the bed most nights before I could get in. (I hate getting into a rumpled bed. These days it doesn't have to be made -- it just can't be all rumpledy and screwed up.) But this mattress actually FITS the sheets -- or vice versa -- so I don't have that problem anymore! However, the rest of my vast linen collection may have to be discarded for other, newer, deeper-hemmed linens. (DARN.)

As for the rest of my life: DESPITE the fact that, even before I took this job, I told The Boss/Friend/Father of My Godchild that I was NOT going to do any programming because (a) I was afraid; (b) I didn't know how; (c) I didn't want to learn; and (d) I wasn't GOING to learn, because I had plenty of other skills he needed -- and he assured me that I wouldn't have to "because there are plenty of people here who can already do that, and we'll have MORE than enough work to keep you busy" -- DESPITE that, I am being forced to attend weekly "classes," taught by one of the programmers [who is a sweet kid, but who is NOT a teacher], in HTML. Now, I grant you, the classes are only at most 30 mins. long, but they ALWAYS come at the MOST inconvenient times ... usually when I'm right in the middle of some project that I've got a groove going in. Or when I'm just about to go to lunch [today], which I usually do quite late so that the day doesn't last too much longer after that (heh). I DON'T WANT TO LEARN HTML, OR CSS, OR FLASH, OR ANY OF THAT OTHER STUFF!!!!

I'm fine now.

Can't wait to go home to my BED ...

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Your "embedded" reporter

nobody@vox.com(frogprof) — Wed, 01 Aug 2007 11:47:49 -0700

Just took delivery of my first new bed in 18 years and it took all my willpower NOT to stay home [I'd had to leave work to meet the delivery guys back at the apartment -- I'd only been at work for an hour, and that entire hour had been spent in our daily "five-minute huddle" because The Boss and one of the programmers were going 'round and 'round about a subject that none of the rest of us (a) understood or (b) had ANY interest in] to test it!! The new mattress is about 6 inches higher than the old one, so I may need a stepladder to get on it; and the DCs ["darn" cats] are going to have to figure out how high to jump! Well, at least The Stink will ... Rabies already has figured out that her 20-lb. self needs to use the trunk at the foot of the bed [which is covered with a duvet that needs to go to the laundromat, but hasn't yet] to make a pit-stop on the way to the bed. That way she doesn't get all worn out and sweaty or something.

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